“And remember, ‘YOU did it and you did it ALONE.’” This is something a relative loves to tell me whenever I share good news with her about my business. Her automatic response, “You did it alone.” A seemingly strong statement revealing her great weakness.
Delusional thinking results in self-absorption
To believe one has “done it alone” is not healthy for business, communities, or families. There is an ugly result from this kind of delusional thinking that I’ve seen first hand all of my life and here’s how it goes:
- I attribute all of my success to me.
- I am amazing and a step (or maybe a staircase) above others because I did it alone.”
- I should not help others (even if they are relatives or friends) for if I do, they won’t learn to “do it alone” like I did.
Take a look at some of the most successful people in the world and you will see many were positioned for success by others who cared about them. Perhaps they were given control of a business by a parent, maybe they were connected to others by a mentor or professor, or maybe their family members were their first customers. The point is, none of this qualifies as “doing it alone.”
The value of a customer – our foundation
I look back and know, without a doubt, that Oz2′s modicum of success has come directly from those open minded, generous people who encouraged the growth of our business – our customers. Without business contacts or a boost from family, my art director and I plunged into the business world with a sense of wonder. Total strangers from the start, our customers saw something special in us. Today, we serve all of our original customers and attribute this to exemplary customer service. Without our loyal customers, oz 2 designs LLC wouldn’t exist.
The value of a referrals – building us up
If you’ve been in business even a short time you learn quickly that word of mouth recommendations make a huge difference. No matter how good you are, your business doesn’t stand a chance if you don’t have a network of people recommending you. Acknowledging that recommendations from others has grown your business is healthy thinking which keeps you safe from the “I did it alone” tragedy. I’m very grateful to those who have taken time out of their busy lives to recommend my business to others. Without their recommendations, Oz2 wouldn’t exist.
You can stop the “I did it alone” tragedy
Sit down and make a list of those people who contributed to where you are today. Think about your childhood, your school years, your family circumstances. What were you given? Were you tracked for success? Some parents take the time to do this ensuring their children receive the finest educational opportunities and other advantages. I’ve seen parents pass their businesses to their children. If this is the case, list it. Take a good look at your business and think about every customer you serve. Think about those people who take the time to spread the word about your business and introduce you to new customers. Add each person who you serve to your list. As you create your list, you will experience an enlightened mindset . My list looks something like this:
- My business would not exist without customers or referrals.
- I ‘m grateful and will always remember those who work and have worked with me to help me get where I am today.
- I want to reach out and help others experience the kind of success I’m experiencing
Your new, enlightened mindset leads to what’s commonly called “an attitude of gratitude.” As a result, you’ll experience a more humble view of yourself and a more loving attitude toward others. What does your list look like?
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Surly E and oz2designs. oz2designs said: I didn't do it alone,and, if you think about it, neither did you: http://bit.ly/degx6A #grateful [...]
Agree with you completely. It’s sad how many people today are “looking after number one” to the extent of actually believing that they did it all by themselves. Every time they meet a person they calculate what they can get out of her/him. Catch is that kind of attitude strikes back at them, sooner or later.
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Catarina – one of my favorite authors, Anthony DeMello, says these people are sleepwalking and don’t know it. “They never understand the loveliness and the beauty of this thing that we call human existence.”
Hello Catherine,
Your post was right on time. This is my first visit to your place and I am 100% glad I stopped by. I can think of a list that spreads so long that I run out of paper, lol. I know that I stand on the shoulders of giants. I have done nothing in and of myself. The more I think about it the more I find it an honor to share the spotlight whenever it shines in my direction. Excellent post!
This is all very true, Catherine. Nice post! And I love the image. Social media is great for building community, giving kudos to others and growing a network of like minded people, all of whom can be resources to turn to for collaboration, referrals, and more. We should all be taking advantage of this fabulous resource!
Jayna
Thanks for sharing your post. Thanks for reminding us thate even though a lot of our time is spent working alone, there are many people that contribute to our success. Most of all I thank God for all his favor and blessings and for all the people he has place in my life.
Deborah H. Bateman recently posted..What Does it mean to be Free-(Romans 6:12-23)
Catherine, your eloquent post is very appropos to the situation going on in Minnesota – and nationwide, really — where top earners say they don’t want to pay more in taxes because — well, because they don’t want to. But usually, because they use private services instead of public services like schools.
Your post reminded me of this saying:
“We have all drank from wells we did not dig; We have been warmed by fires we did not build; We have sat in the shade of trees we did not plant; We are where we are because of what someone else did.”
- Author Unknown
Sounds like something a mother would say Catherine.
I’m more of the “It takes a village” mindset myself. I don’t believe any of us can build a successful business without a support system.
Sherryl Perry recently posted..6 Reasons to NOT Build a Website
In previous senior executive roles, I would have not been able to achieve overall business targets, without my team achieving their individual and team targets. Equally, I would not have been able to launch my food blog without my 12 year old cooking my recipes and my hubby filming, editing videos and occasionally helping out with the copywriting. You nailed it!
This is much like the “pay it forward” concept. No one succeeds alone, ever. From family and friends to coworkers and customers we always have help along the way. Always good to remember this small fact!
Very good reminders Catherine and when you think about it if you achieve by yourself it would be a very lonely celebration.
Susan Oakes recently posted..Know Your Customer Mix to Increase Sales
Catherine,
Such a wonderful article and a great reminder that we should be thankful and acknowledge those who help us, even if it is just a kind word. I try my best to be kind to people and offer what I can. I have a friend who tells me, how can you give when you are in need yourself. I tell him…If its not going to hurt me to give it, I give it.
I dislike the city that I live in, but love my neighbors, they are absolutely wonderful. You will never go hungry or in need if they can help it. We pull together without a second thought. If you mention you need something, if one of my neighbors has it they are going to give it. We feed each other, pass along clothes, bikes, whatever. If it is still usable, we pass it along. I am a single mother and my neighbors look out my kids like they are their kids and I look out for theirs. We are a great community and I love them. If I am under deadline and need peace they will get my kids out of my hair for me, they are just great.
I wish more people and communities were this way. We believe in it takes a village to raise a child and we look out for on another.
Great post again,
Jenn
Jennifer Woodard recently posted..I am looking for people to interview for my blog
So true! And a good caveat to my post today probably. I take on one pro-bono client every couple of months as a way of giving back in acknowledgement of the lucky breaks and generosity that got me where I am today. I think all businesses should take money out of the equation at least once a year in order to learn the true value of their work.
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I totally agree with this post! I write a lot about graditude and the law if attraction and these are at the core of what you speak of. None of us work in a vacuum nor could we. What we give we get back and I see this in my life everyday. Thanks for this great post!
Lora (The Hugging Home)
I LOVE how you talk about the “I did it alone” tragedy! It is so easy to fall into this self-congratulatory thinking, and it’s so easy to think others ar achieving alone, in a vacuum, when that is almost 100% not true. It’s so important to share credit, express thanks, and acknowledge those who’ve influenced you positively and helped you succeed. And it is SO good for business.